Congads to Mr. and Mrs. Evil Bastard on their new little bastard.

Leah Dianne was born 2:45 am on Monday, Mom and Dad are doing great too.

From dc-stuff:
” Let us pretend that there is a village in the mists of Nowhere.
Durak the Ignoble, leper, fool and resident of this village, has the habit of finding feces from all the creatures of hill and dale and bringing it back to the town square to play with. The townsfolk loathe Durak, because he is an idiot, and because he does nothing useful, and because he constantly brings the odor and filth of shit with him whereever he goes. The townsfolk repel him each time they see him with cudgels and brickbats, but Durak, having a thick skull and little mind to process “pain” inputs, is not affected even one tiny little bit by this. God protects fools and madmen.

One day, during a shit-finding excursion, Durak finds a large diamond. This diamond is the largest that any of the townsfolk have ever seen, and it is as brilliant as the summer sun. Light dances and sizzles among the natural facets of the jewel, exposing no flaw in their travels. The townsfolk, naturally, remark on the jewel:

“This is amazing. It may, in fact, be the first valuable thing that Durak has ever brought back to the village.”

Question for the audience: Is this a statement about Durak, or about the diamond?”

So, what else can we do to piss off the muslims? I know, let’s hire female contractors to give POW’s lap dances and pretend to smear them with menstrual blood.

It’s ironic that we’re such a prudish society ourselves when our interrogators think themselves innovative by using this appalling tactic (irony liberally applied). Imagine, for example, if we were at war with the Dutch and used this technique; meanwhile, they’d enjoy the show and wait for us to expense their trip to the hash bar.

This headline about some Christians protesting the secularization of Christmas caught my eye as I was perusing the news.

Maybe we should go full circle back to the pagan holiday of Yule for the whole commercial aspect of the season. It would make more sense and possibly offend less Christians.

Just spent the week in Dallas. I can’t say that I was too impressed by it.

First, finding a decent hotel was difficult compared to other towns.

The weather sucked, it was cold and windy. I may as well have stayed here in VA and gotten a little rain with my cold and wind.

The place seemed pretty polluted, but that could have been due to all of the construction going on in the area in which I stayed.

The only redeeming quality I found was in the layout of the streets: you can make a u-turn anywhere; presumably, people down there aren’t too sure of where they’re going.

The people seemed okay, but one amusing thing is that the society there is as such that corporations there feel the need to post “Do not bring your concealed weapons on site” signs in front of their office buildings.

Either my standards have dropped significantly or Zinger’s writing is approaching professional quality.

So, what gives? Up until this year Dr. Webdonkey’s news submissions showed a flagrant disregard of any attempts at editing and his grammatical style erred on the side of the unpublishable.

Recently, though, Zingro puts Herr Palahniuk to shame in style, composition, and voice.

Dude, keep it up.

I know, inveterate sleazy single guy finally finds a woman who thinks that she might like to endure his annoying tendancies and pretentious ponderings for the rest of her life.

Nothing works: including things that normally work in other places, such as elevators and street lights.

The roads suck, and yet there’s still a toll.

People are, indeed, rude.

The pollution induces nausea and headaches.

I really didn’t mean all that stuff that I said before the war about how Saddam should Join NATO and then open casinos, turning Iraq into the Las Vegas of the Middle East. It was satire, honestly. Anyway, he didn’t follow my advice and look what happened.

Why the sudden paranoia?

Link to reason for this post

Man, life was so much more fun when the Soviet Union was dangling its nuclear arsenal over our heads, putting us in a “Pit and the Pendulum” situation where we thought: dare we strike first? Must we? Should we await the pendulum to fall and eviscerate us or risk the pit? Where is General LaSalle to save us now? (man, I hope everyone gets that)